At the end of September, I moved to Oslo… for two weeks a month. During the other two weeks, I’m still living in Hoegaarden. So, I literally live in two worlds. Or even better: I’m moving between two worlds. People on the Move… now, I’m definitely on the move!
Adapting to this new life isn’t easy; I really have to get used to it. That doesn’t happen by itself, but luckily I have Transactional Analysis (TA) to help me handle these changes.
TA helps to make the journey from Hoegaarden to Oslo
What mainly helps is the concept of autonomy in TA.
- Conscious: I’m here and now. Whenever I’m in Oslo, I am in Oslo. Whenever I’m in Hoegaarden, I am in Hoegaarden. I let go of the rest…
- Spontaneous: in TA this means that I have free access to all Ego states. In every situation I can choose whether I communicate, think and feel from my Parent, my Adult or my Child.
You can read more about Ego states in this blog: “How do you find the Pipi Longstocking in yourself?” - Intimacy: I can choose to make contact with others … or not! I noticed that during the first two weeks in Oslo I really needed cocoons*; to be at home, make my nest. So, I haven’t really seen much of Oslo yet.
* Cocooning, adopting the Foetus position, indicates that someone needs safety. The opposite of this posture is the Moro reflex, named after the stretch a baby make when it is born. Body language can say a lot about a person and knowledge of it is therefore a valuable and useful tool for coaches and therapists. Want to know more about this? Then take a look at this page about my Embodied Therapy & Coaching.
‘What am I doing here?’
Frankly, I have occasionally wondered “what am I doing here”?
And even more honestly: the night before all our furniture arrived in Oslo, it really hit me: What the hell am I starting? Four years of traveling up and down. Isn’t it going to be too busy? Am I going to be able to handle it? Will I be able to run the training institution from a distance? I immediately got a cold, lost my voice and really only wanted to go home.
The simple answer is – I’m accompanying my husband, who will live here for four years for his work. Of course, my relationship with him is important and that’s reason enough to come along. That is also the most important reason to live in Oslo.
But I didn’t want to go to Oslo full-time… So, I chose to combine the best of both worlds and to travel on and off.
Making choices using TA
When I asked myself “What am I doing here?” And “What am I doing to myself by starting a life that I will travel to and from so often?”, I found the real reasons for my choice.
It is really important in my life to promote TA, in my training institute (and as a therapist, coach and trainer in companies). That is my inspiration, my mission in life. I sincerely believe that the world will become more beautiful and better if we act according to TA’s methods and live according to TA’s philosophy.
If I would come to Oslo full-time, I would have had a quiet life. A beautiful house in a beautiful city and lots of free time. Yet I choose to keep doing my job. Because I sincerely believe that I can make a difference with it. Within my own sphere of influence, I am working on a better world. The ripple effect takes care of the rest …
New situation, new approach
Through the new developments in the TA Expertise Center, I hope to combine one thing and another well. I will teach when I am in Belgium and provide online supervision and mentoring from Oslo as part of the new approach.
I just assume things will fall into place.
Or rather: I assume that I can give everything a place.
So, you are – still – welcome to my Yurt in Hoegaarden!